Dirty Balls Rugby

As the first 2 parts have stated, England have a pack with runners, a midfield that can crash and whippets out wide.  Scotland have picked a team with a need and runners of their own. They have abrasion and risk in equal measure in their selections.

Scotsmen think they can win this. Englishmen have an expectation to win. Alex Ferguson himself thinks Scotland have a chance. We will all be watching and wondering.

So as it is, frankly, impossible to tell if this game will be close, a rout or an 8 point victory I have come up with how the game would pan out if it was played in my head. Yeah. That dark, scary place…

Anthems: Scotland, backed by boisterous support and a few extra Kiwis, roar into the ‘Flower’ and shake Eden Park to its very foundations. ‘God Save the Queen’, in comparison, is sung at an adequate pace and with a noise level acceptable to Johnno’s ears. Robinson doesn’t take part.

Kick-Off: Wilkinson lofts the ball (a regulation ball, that we are assured hasn’t been tampered with) into the air. Scotland claim it well enough, but run through 6 phases without making much headway. Jackson kicks it out and some mumblings start already that this will be a game of bosch and nudge.

Minute 4: Disaster strikes. 40m out Lamont tears out of the line to try and annihilate Wilkinson –which he does –but the OBE flicks a cute pass to Ashton who runs it in and delivers a cripplingly irritating Swan Dive. Wilkinson nails the kick.

Minute 5: Paterson chips in with a relatively simple kick to keep us close.

Minute 22: Strokosch delivers a monstrous hit on James Haskell, causing a flare up. Moody steps in to cool things down, but not before Thompson attempts to kiss as many Scots as possible.

Minute 29: Croft returns the favour chasing a kick and smashing Max Evans, who spills it forward into touch. The resulting scrum, much like the rest of the game is more even than many commentators would have expected and Murray gives Matt Stevens a hard time.

Minute 35: Jackson shakes off some tacklers to get closer to the line –“was that an offside, Ref?”- and feeds an Evans who hobbles through a gap as Tuilagi shoots in with another big hit. Paterson creeps into the pocket and slots a drop goal few had expected him to take on. 7-6.

Half-Time: More handbags ensue and the rain starts tumbling down. The ref blows the whistle and both captains get into the sheds early, hoping to get their teams to calm down. The ITV coverage is as grim as before, but the analysis is lightened up by images of England’s dressing room where they are clearly getting an earful from Johnno. Wilkinson, in particular, seems to be getting it tight about his kicking out of hand. Flood is trying not to look up, and a face peels round the toilet door just out of view. Surely England wouldn’t sneak suspended Dave Alred into the dressing room…

Kick-Off: The game restarts and it is as heated as before. Mauls break out from the English and Croft looks more and more wasted as he and Lawes take up wide positions, but aren’t hit.

Minute 44: England give away another penalty, proving that under pressure they can commit atrocious amounts of infringements. The crowd sense it too. As it is further out Jackson takes it on confidently. He drills it through just as cameras catch Johnson slamming his fists on the desk and making for the door.

Minute 60: Scotland are tackling like dervishes, but they are also running into brick walls in attack. They are often stringing 8 phases together. Eventually, though, the referee has had enough and yellow cards Deacon for persistent team offences.

Minute 73: Deacon is back on, but now Youngs has been carded for the same reason. From a ruck Cusiter, on for Blair, chips over the top 22m out and Evans races through to touch down. 11-7 to Scotland and then Jackson makes the kick. 13-7! There is little time to catch breathe. Despite this Robinson fights the urge to chuck on the subs.

Minute 75: The defence is really firing at this point. To a man Scotland are pushing forward and hitting anything in white. Barclay looks close to vomiting, but he won’t stop screaming in the line. Flood and Foden are moaning as they can’t get any ball, particularly in space. Hartley is on for Thompson but he is struggling to keep his cool as Ansbro cuts out a menacing, drifting run from Armitage. It may stay like this…

Minute 78: Rennie is on for Strokosch who couldn’t run anymore and the Edinburgh man charges down a kick from Flood. Vernon chases after it and catches Ashton with the ball 10m from his own line. The England team look flustered and they resort for pick and goes.

Minute 80: The Ball is cleared 15m out from the line and Scotland have one last chance. They recycle the ball, and Mike Blair is forced to step into contact. A few phases lead to forwards rumbling and the ball ends up in Lamont’s hands at first receiver but he retains it. Jackson is behind the ruck…I feel sick….Did he slot that?!!

After Match analysis: Neither side is available for comment. There is confusing everywhere. Even Tindall’s harem of paparazzi are at a loss. Robinson is still wandering around the pitch somewhere. This should make things interesting, huh? Did you see that…?!

In an effort to show a genuine response from a genuine guy, I have not altered this in any way. This is an email I got from Berni Stortoni at the start of the week:

“Hi Alan,
Well now everyone in Argentina is very happy with the team. The effort that the players did it during the game was excellent.
I think Scotland lost the chance to close the game in the first 20′ in the second half.
Now I hope Scotland beat England!!!!”

In four sentences this ex-Warrior has summed up what happened on Sunday. Scotland missed their chance to put themselves straight through to the Quarter Finals against a hard working but unglamorous South American side. Now we all live in hope.

Despite the incessant reports of what Scotland need to do; to rely on; to expect, we have a clear objective. An objective perhaps clearer that any we have had during this World Cup campaign. We need to beat the Auld Enemy by a minimum of 8 points.

Sure we could hope Georgia pull one out of the fire and smoke an Argentinean side that is bruised and held together at the seams by sticky tape and Felipe Contepomi’s force of will. We could hope that Gorgodze continues his devastating rampage in this tournament and takes out Contepomi, Lobbe and Ledesma. He won’t, though, and I doubt we can rely on results elsewhere. Scotland need to stick to the plan. Focus on our objective.

There are many possible permutations in this pool, but the intention must be made clear. The team Robinson has picked certainly has an air of ‘Last Chance Roll’ about it, but that last chance lasts 80minutes. The team cannot worry itself with notions of blistering bonus tries, because we forget what is at hand. A game of phases.

In front of Scotland strides an England team naming its most dynamic back-row available, as well as Courtney Lawes. In the backs they have the much hyped, but frustratingly potent wildcard, Manu Tuilagi. Behind him there is a back-three that bookmakers are struggling to lengthen in odds to score. This team is full of direct, assertive and varied runners.

Strangely, though, to England’s detriment the men manning their rudders, Wilkinson and Thompson, are selected again despite struggling to recapture the spirit of ’03. Martin Johnson does not underestimate their talismanic properties, but he is certain to use Flood and Hartley in the last 3rd/4er of the game. He will leave nothing to chance.

Scotland, on the other hand, are banking on chance.

Against Argentina we lost a game at the death. Our clunking control was bypassed by a dancing full-back, and we lost it for the end minutes. We must recapture that control –something I am now sure Ruaridh Jackson is capable of –and let our own runners run…away from contact areas.

The team we have picked is full of running, too. The selections of Vernon, Lamont at 12 and Danielli and Evans means that we could counter attack at the fringes. It also offers offload runners at staggered positions on the pitch. Defensively, too, it has more of a feel of Scrammblers (although there will be a programmed defender, probably Strokosch or Barclay, who will filter in behind Lamont who will have licence to fly at Tuilagi or Tindall).

Don’t misinterpret, please. The defence will be one of pressure and constant waves between the 15m lines. This represents the biggest game in almost all of these players’ lives. The tackling will be robust and the bodies sacrificed. It is just that with Vernon, Barclay and Strokosch, Danielli, Evans, Paterson and Lamont we look set fair to retreat in haste should England spring a half-break. Staging a shutout, for the objective.

Up front Strokosh, Gray, Kellock, Ford and Murray will be expected to chew dirt, make tackles and spoil play. They will be made to man the collisions as if Johnson himself was barking orders through a bullhorn at the back of each contact. Be alert, be physical.

The good thing is that now, once any permutations are forgotten and the build-up work ignored we are still just left with that recognition: it is all or nothing. Remember the objective, remember the roles. Remember the hits.

Remember the objective.

After this game a lot of analysis may come down to how Kellock fared against a ferocious and rested Lawes. Credence may be paid to how Blair moved with Youngs. Experts may marvel at the outcome of Lamont’s gambling shots out of the defensive line. We may all rue not setting out to find a bonus point against Georgia. Should Rory Lamont have had more time on the pitch? Speculation will happen immediately after the game.

Whatever the lines and whatever the outcome, however, Scotland will still have offered an answer to a simple question about hope and a need for victory.

Did we deliver on the Objective?

Pete South from RugbyFanCast gives us his views on tomorrow’s titanic clash from an English perspective..:

And so, three teams remain in Pool B. Georgia and Romania have huffed and puffed, and threatened to blow the houses of England and Scotland down, but now both teams are consigned to four years in the wilderness before the bright light shines on them once more.

Georgia can still leave their mark on the group; a shock victory would do nicely for both England and Scotland, but in truth their spirit left this tournament some time ago. Having won what both they and Romania admitted was the only game worth getting fired up for, Georgia will take to the field against the Pumas knowing there is little more they can do, nor is there anything more expected of them.

The Georgian Prime Minister turned up for one match, and one match only. Can you guess which one?

So that means that the onus lies with either Scotland or England to grasp the thorny rose or thistle. Scotland must claim their biggest ever win over the old enemy in 25 years while England must do one thing; avoid defeat. 

But that isn’t everything riding on a game that counts for everything. Nick De Luca picked and poked at old wounds when he suggested that the sweet icing on the cake of qualifying from the group stages would come with English embarrassment.

“No matter who we were playing this weekend, it could be – it hopefully won’t be – our last game in the World Cup.” The centre said. “If we do it right, England would go out, which would be an added bonus, but it’s not the incentive itself.”

There is no doubt that either side would get a little kick of Schadenfreude from the misery of the other, but De Luca is embarking along a particularly dangerous path that could lead to bullet being lodged in his foot with a smoking pistol clenched in his hand.

In a game of such significance for both teams, there can be little room for sentiment or emotion, or at least emotion channelled in the wrong direction; baiting an opponent through patriotism, genuine dislike or just through mischievousness can easily backfire. 

Introducing sub-plots and added elements to a game which has the importance of a World Cup winner-takes-all match complicates and takes the eye off what is important; just ask Warren Gatland. His outburst against Dylan Hartley before the 6 Nations curtain raiser between Wales and England provided England with enough ballast to take their rivals to the cleaners. He banned himself from doing any pre-match interviews for the rest of the tournament after he provided England with motivational material.

Not that De Luca’s comments were anywhere near the level of Gatland’s, he speaks only the truth. But the rivalry between these two is obvious. Both teams are aware of it and the importance of it, and De Luca need not set a see-saw in motion that he might not be able to control – such games are built upon controlling and suffocating errors and mistakes. There is certainly such thing as being too fired up.

Scotland have a good record against England away from Twickenham – in fact for the last game England won away from HQ you have to go back to 2004. 

Having hinted at what they are capable of, Scotland must take something of a two footed leap into the unknown in their biggest game of the tournament. Despite being on top for much of the game against Argentina, they were unable to rely upon a moment of brilliance like the one Lucas Gonzalez Amorosino produced.

Now against England they must light the fire than has only so far sparked intermittently. This will of course be a tight game played out most likely through the pack. Neither side will want to take a risk with so much at stake (much like the Argentina game) but now Scotland must look to ensure that the moment of brilliance comes from a man in a deep blue shirt this time.

Max Evans has hinted at an ability to run the ball with some success, but he must show more. If the forwards can provide a platform or England repeat their penalty-prone antics of games gone by, then the stage is his to be the difference.

You never know, De Luca may see his replacement become the scythe to match the blunt, brute force of his country’s forwards. If so, then he can taunt England all he wants, safe in the knowledge that retribution or revenge is some way off and not a couple days away.

In a few hours I will post my reposte…